


Behind (Larry Stylinson AU)

by iceheart104



Category: Larry Stylinson - Fandom, One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, College AU, F/M, Harry has a learning disability, Harry is intellectually challenged, M/M, harry is a baker
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-10
Updated: 2015-12-25
Packaged: 2018-04-14 00:44:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4543647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iceheart104/pseuds/iceheart104
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry was slower than the other kids. In everything, really. He couldn't learn as fast, his brain wouldn't keep up. Harry knew he was different, no matter how hard he tried to be the same. He was in separate classes and he was stuck behind everyone else. Even at age nineteen, graduated from school, he can't go to college with his best mate Niall. He's stuck in the back, and he hates it. No matter how much Harry tries, he just can't catch up, he can't be accepted fully. But as a new friend Louis realizes, maybe he can make Harry feel accepted without the whole world being on board.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Lunch

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note:
> 
> Dear any reader who happens to stumble on this little story of mine - keep in mind that I do not know much about intellectually challenged individuals, nor do I know one well personally and I am not one. I apologize if my lack of knowledge (and though I do try to research occasionally) offends anyone. This is a story of me simply trying to portray it in a way I see fit for the story to go along, and though I don't know much about the situation, I do have a plan for the storyline.
> 
> I hope I don't offend anyone and I hope you enjoy the story. :)

Chapter One

 

Harry’s long fingers slid back and forth, sullenly bouncing a pen on his desk. He was in a 'mood', which didn't bode well for the rest of the day. Despite Harry's attempts to shake himself out of it, some still remained - luckily, he felt it was something he could smother enough to get by Niall as 'normal'.

“Haz?” a voice called to him, and he spun around in his chair. “Hey buddy, how are you doing?’ Niall said softly, reaching out and rubbing his shoulder. Harry shrunk away from it, and Niall slowly retracted his arm. So much for seeming natural.

“M’fine.” Harry replied, staring at Niall’s shoes. Harry mostly stared at people’s shoes. He liked people’s shoes much better than having to try to look them in the eye. Although that was a nice factor, it wasn’t the only reason he looked at people’s shoes. They were interesting. Harry just loved shoes. On people. Not shoe shopping, or shoes in boxes, but the shoes on people – he just found them fascinating.

“Okay…” Niall said, his hand hovering a little too far away from his side to be normal. Harry didn’t really like the way that Niall babied him. Harry wasn’t a baby. All his life, all people did was baby him. Harry could understand things and people and he did well in the school classes they put him in. He graduated high school, but not with all the classes that other kids had to graduate with.

Harry knew he could’ve been like other kids, if he’d had the chance, and some help. But no one let him try. They wouldn’t even let him go to P.E like everyone else. In grade school, everyone loved P.E. Harry could hear them talking about it at lunch. They got to run around and have fun, play games. But Harry wasn’t allowed to join them. He was forced to relearn letters and numbers and be basically babysat with kids that were more “like him” than the ones who got to go to classes without having a supervisor per child and run around and play and talk and make friends.

Harry didn’t truly resent the people who had been trying to help him, but he resented the fact he couldn’t speak up enough to tell them that he was okay. That he could do things just like everyone else. But he was too quiet, too shy, too scared. And now he was still being babysat, at age nineteen. Niall was his friend, sure, but he still treated him like he was a lot younger than he truly was. Niall, only a few months older than Harry, was living in a little apartment with him, and going to uni as a twenty year old. Harry couldn’t really attend uni, he didn’t know what to major in, and Niall didn’t want to have to worry about him either, Harry assumed, so he stayed at home a lot. He had a job on the weekends, but Niall often called in and told his boss he wasn’t coming in that day. Harry didn’t always like the alternatives that Niall had him try. Niall would force him out to a pub with some friends, or just the two of them (which happened more often than with friends), to a football game, to a movie (the movies Niall chose were not movies Harry typically enjoyed), or something else, something Niall just came up with off the top of his head. They’d gone to random places, and Harry didn’t usually like the things they did. Harry, who barely managed to pass his driver’s test, was always the designated driver when Niall got drunk. Harry wasn’t particularly fond of alcohol and didn’t often drink more than one light beer.

Even though Harry didn’t often like the things they did, he didn’t usually hate them, either. He got a good laugh out of Niall when they went to pubs, and he got to eat nicer meals than the top ramen Niall usually supplied during the week. When the went to the movies, he got buttery popcorn – which was a small compensation for the times that Niall brought him to a horror movie and Harry left the theatre halfway through.

When Niall didn’t bring him out on the weekends (mostly Saturdays), Harry worked at the bakery. Harry loved his job, even though he was babied there, too. Sundays were his favorite day, his favorite because he got to go to the bakery and work for a long time. There weren’t many places open on the weekend like Harry’s bakery was. It was also open during the week like normal businesses, but Harry’s favorite part about it was the strangeness of the little place.

Although Harry didn’t work on the weekdays, and he didn’t have school on them either, he didn’t sit at home for five days straight. He was a bit more ambitious than that. Harry would sometimes take Niall out to lunch – drive down to campus and pick him up and take him out. Sometimes, if Harry was feeling brave, he would go and work during the week while Niall was out. He was mostly afraid of Niall catching him. Harry knew that Niall probably wouldn’t be able to do anything about it, that he wouldn’t punish him in any way.

No matter how much Harry wanted to be treated as an adult, even he treated himself like a child. He knew without respect for himself, people wouldn’t respect him. As if people respected him anyway. Most people treated him well, babied him like most do. But there are also people who see him and spit rude words at him. Harry ignores them… mostly. If Niall were around, he’d often beat the crap out of them, unless Harry could stop him. Harry knew he was different, if he wasn’t, then he wouldn’t be unable to go to school with Niall, he wouldn’t be treated differently, he wouldn’t have taken longer than the other kids to learn how to read and count and speak. He wouldn’t have to be babysat.

“Harry, I was wondering if you wanted to come out to lunch with me and the boys?” Niall asked, his arm still drifting closer and closer to Harry. Harry hated being touched, he knew that wasn’t exactly normal, but he couldn’t stand feeling other people on him. Harry focused on his arm, instead of staring at Niall’s shoes and not hearing what he says. Niall was waiting patiently for an answer while Harry slowly calculated through his options. If Niall was going out to lunch, it was less likely that he’d get drunk. Although Niall’s “boys” didn’t really like Harry much, they were still fun to hang around with. They were good guys, even if they didn’t really connect with Harry, and didn’t like him much. Harry couldn’t really blame them, if he was “normal”, he probably wouldn’t want to hang around him either. Regardless, they put up with him, because they knew he was Niall’s best mate.

There was really only one guy in Niall’s “boys” that seemed to like Harry. Harry liked him too, he was pretty quiet, and from what he understood, super creative. His name was Zayn. Zayn was a nice lad, when Harry tried to make conversation it was always with Zayn (when it wasn’t with Niall).

“Who all is coming?” Harry eventually asked quietly.

“Uh, well, there’s some new lads coming along.” Niall responded awkwardly, shifting his weight. Harry was now staring at his side, as his arm was no longer outstretched.

“New? Why?” Harry asked. He had gotten comfortable not being fully accepted in Niall’s group of friends. He didn’t exactly want to have to try to fit in again.

“Well, Zayn introduced me to one of his friends and we quite hit it off. He’s bringing one of his friends that Zayn says is pretty nice.” Niall said, shifting again. Harry kept staring at Niall’s side while he thought. If they were Zayn’s friends, Harry figured they’re probably pretty decent. However, that didn’t mean that they’d accept him very well. Harry kept staring at Niall’s side and couldn’t decide if it was worth it to go or not.

“What happened to the other boys?” Harry asked nervously.

“Well, Matt’s on vacay back home. Tyler was kind of a douche, and once he got into a fight at school I kinda ditched him. Rob and Derek followed. Nick moved to Germany, and that just leaves Zayn.” Niall explained, ringing his hands off to the side of Harry’s face. Harry didn’t mind that they had left, as Tyler and Rob had really made snide remarks to him when Niall wasn’t around or couldn’t hear, and Derek had completely ignored him, as if he didn’t exist. Matt and Nick had been okay to Harry. Either way, he wasn’t accepted, except by Zayn.

“So there will be two more joining us?” Harry asked, thinking back to what Niall had said before.

“Yeah. Liam and his friend… I can’t remember his name. Zayn said he was a nice lad, though.” Niall responded, assuring Harry. He was still not sure if he wanted to join. Harry definitely didn’t want to be sitting at home for a few hours while Niall was with them, and he couldn’t go down to the bakery if Niall had the truck. Harry sighed.

“If it’s any compensation, I told them I might be bringing you.” Niall said, and Harry half froze.

“What do you mean?” Harry asked, fear in his eyes.

“I just told them I might be taking my best mate along.” Niall said, quickly backtracking. Harry knew he was trying to undo what he had just said. Now, knowing that Niall could’ve possibly told the only people who were going to show up that the person Niall was bringing along had “problems”, Harry could’ve just driven them away. Harry full well knew that if they didn’t show up, it was his fault. He was fairly sure they wouldn’t.

“Did you tell them… about me?” Harry asked timidly. He already knew the answer was yes.

“Well… just a little bit.” Niall replied awkwardly.

“Oh.” Harry said, even though he full well expected that. He knew if he went, Niall would be lonely without his friends. Harry sighed and nodded. “I’ll go with you.” He couldn’t see Niall’s face, but he knew he was smiling.

“Thanks mate, I can’t wait to introduce you guys.” Niall said excitedly. Harry just nodded. He didn’t want to see the expression on Ni’s face when his “friends” didn’t show up.

Niall drifted off to quickly get ready and find his wallet. Harry turned back to the desk. He didn’t want to tap his pen anymore… he didn’t really have a purpose for it at the moment. Harry stood up and pushed the spindly chair back towards the desk. He sauntered over to his bed, where all of his things were carefully organized. Niall wasn’t very clean, or organized, and that sometimes drove Harry absolutely bonkers. Harry kept all of his books stacked carefully on the bookshelf above his bed, his dresser was strictly regulated and he had everything in its place. His clothes all had to be perfectly folded in the drawers and he never left his trash lying around. Niall was the exact opposite. His school stuff was thrown beside his bed; empty soda bottles or packages for food littered his bed and floor, dirty clothes everywhere, and he seldom bothered to wash his clothes in the first place. When Niall went out (whether it be to school or with friends or anything), Harry would clean up his bed area. Harry couldn’t stand how messy it was. Niall always promised that he’d be cleaner, but he never did. Harry didn’t mind cleaning up after him. Niall was his best mate and he didn’t really have anyone else anymore. Harry loved the guy, no matter how hard it was for him to show it. In many ways, Niall was his brother – just sometimes it was like Harry was older, and sometimes it was like he was younger. Either way, he didn’t mind it. He loved Niall.

Harry decided to change his shirt. He started fumbling through his drawers for something nicer than the over-sized, holey t-shirt he was wearing at the moment. He struggled out of his shirt, but kept his jeans. Harry groped through his drawer searching for a nice shirt.

“Haz, do you need something to wear?’ Niall’s voice asked softly from the doorway to the bathroom. Harry jumped and spun, his arms hugging his middle protectively, out of habit, and the fact he didn’t like people seeing the tattoos he had covering his chest and stomach – and that he had four nipples, but that was beside the point.

“Uhm…” Harry started slowly.

“It’s okay buddy. I’ll get you one of my shirts.” Niall said, crossing the room to his dresser, and pulled out a nice button up shirt, a pale blue, obviously too big for Niall.

“Here, wear this. I’ll help you button it up.” Niall said and tossed it onto Harry’s bed. He slowly leaned over and picked it up, and stared at the pretty fabric.

“You sure?” Harry asked timidly. He didn’t want to mess up the nice shirt.

“Yeah, big guy, go ahead.” Niall smiled at him from across the room. Harry slipped his arms through the shirt, and it hung open, showing his milky white chest patterned with Harry’s two birds and the butterfly across his abdomen. Harry stared back into Niall’s eyes for once. Niall smiled sweetly, taking in the way Harry looked in the shirt. Harry stared down at the shirt and started fumbling with the buttons, attempting to button the shirt up, but that was something Harry never could really do. The holes were too small and the buttons too slippery, the whole concept threw him for a loop. The button on his jeans was easier, since it was bigger, and if he tried really hard he could usually get it done and undone. Occasionally, he’d have to call Niall into the bathroom to help him do the button, but usually he was okay.

Niall walked up to him and took the buttons from his fingers and swiftly buttoned up the whole shirt. Niall knew Harry didn’t like shirts going low enough to see his tattoos, and he preferred to be safe and keep it above them. Harry, who wasn’t completely sure what had compelled him to get all the tattoos he had, and the only reason he had them was because Niall was laid back and his best mate – if he wanted something, Niall usually followed through unless he had an important reason not to.

When Niall had finished buttoning up the shirt, he smiled kindly up at Harry. Harry was tall, taller than stunted Niall. Harry looked taller than he really was, mostly because he was thin and lean, which accentuated his height. Niall’s looks were against him, as he was a bit stockier.

After Niall was done, his hands lingered on Harry’s collarbones, the smile fading, and concern taking its place. Harry frowned and pulled away. He still didn’t like being touched.

“Okay buddy, let’s get going.” Niall said, turning and picking up his wallet off the bed, and led the way out of their apartment. Harry nodded behind him, even though he knew Niall couldn’t see him, and followed him out the door.

Niall’s key jangled as he locked the door behind him, and then again when he unlocked the truck. Harry quickly opened his own passenger side door and climbed in before Niall tried to help him with it. He knew how to open the door and get in, he knew how to strap himself in, he did know these things.

Once Niall climbed into the car and started it up and quickly shut off the radio that was blasting (Harry easily got headaches at loud noises), a question struck Harry.

“Where are we going?” he asked suddenly, his eyes wide and straightforward as Niall backed out of the parking space.

“Uh, some lunch place…” Niall said slowly. Harry knew he didn’t really know what it was called. Harry dropped it.

The drive was quiet as Harry stayed still, and stared out the windshield. It was spring, and nice outside, warm with a nice breeze. It was sunny and the trees were very pretty. It didn’t take long for Niall to pull up beside a little lunch shop with several nice outdoor umbrellas and tables, and an initial indoor shop. Niall turned off the car and sat back, pulling out his phone.

“Niall, aren’t we going in to meet them?” Harry asked hesitantly, staring at the shop like it was the most intimidating thing on the planet.

“Nah, Zayn is gonna text me when he gets here. It’s alright man, we’ll be fine.” Niall replied, staring at his iPhone. Harry sighed, because he knew that what Niall really meant was that Harry would be fine.

After a few minutes of Harry watching people eat through the window, Niall’s phone beeped and Niall grinned.

“There we are mate, Zayn’s here. C’mon, he has his friends with him.” He said enthusiastically. Harry nodded and opened the door. Niall came around and walked towards the shop next to him. Harry spotted Zayn with his two friends, one taller in a plain white t-shirt and blue jeans with plain brown hair in a quiff, and a shorter one with caramel hair and piercing blue eyes, donning a red Doors t-shirt with a jean jacket and black straight jeans. Harry stared at the three, immediately nervous. He ducked his head and walked with Niall to the door.

“Hey, mates!” Niall said happily, clapping Zayn on the back as they got nearer.

“What’s up, man?” Zayn replied, and Harry could hear the smile in his voice. “Here, Harry, meet Liam and Louis.” Zayn turned his attention to Harry, which made him uncomfortable, except he raised his head and nodded at them. However, the one in the white t-shirt had different intentions.

“Hey, Harry, I’m Liam.” He said, holding out his hand, with a smile on his face. Harry only knew this from quickly glancing up at his face before looking at his hand and taking a few seconds to decide whether or not to shake it. Harry glanced up at Liam’s face again, where his smile stayed planted, but his eyes wavered. Harry was afraid to shake his hand, but he wasn’t sure he could avoid it without looking like an idiot, so he put his hand forward and quickly shook Liam’s hand before hiding his hand in his pocket again. Liam’s smile was enforced and Harry felt okay as he tucked his head down again. The other boy, Louis, didn’t really say anything to him. Harry wasn’t sure if he was glad about that or not – it avoided unnecessary human contact and embarrassment, but it also brought up the point that Louis probably didn’t like Harry. Harry just kept his head down as Niall led the way into the little shop. He hung back and looked at the colors of the tiles in the flooring while Niall talked to the front desk for a table. The little restaurant was nice, a little small, but very nice. Harry liked the openness of it and the welcoming look of it. A nice young lady came out to lead them to their table that they had chosen to have outside. Although the rest of the boys probably thought Niall pushing for it was because it was a nice day, in reality, Harry knew it was because Niall knew that Harry loved the sunshine.

Harry sat between Niall and Zayn, and across from Louis and Liam (the table was circular). He kept his head down and mostly just listened to their conversation instead of trying to take part. When Niall got up to ask the waitress for a sprite instead of Pepsi for Liam, no one shot rude remarks at him, for which he was thankful. Louis didn’t speak to him until the food arrived, though.

“So, Harry, are you in school or something?” he asked, as they had been talking about their classes, and Harry had stayed quiet. He hadn’t wanted them to know that he couldn’t really go to school.

“Uhm… no.” Harry replied quietly.

“Oh.” Louis said softly. “How bout a job?” he asked. Harry’s face lit up into a smile.

“Yeah, I work at the bakery on Springdale.” Harry said happily and looked up from his lap to Louis’ face. His expression was soft and kind, and that surprised Harry. His voice was high and sharp at times, but now it was softer.

“That sounds really nice. You like it there, I take it?” Louis replies, a small smile heightening his nice features.

“Yeah, I do.” Harry replied, still grinning. Harry looked back down as Louis got sucked back into the conversation with the rest of the boys. Harry picked at his sandwich, his stomach still in a swirl from being with the boys, but he felt accepted. Not shoved off. Zayn and Niall talked to him often, but Harry felt like he was shoving them off more than they were him – he was simply nervous from being around them.

“Hey, Harry, do you have a phone?” Liam asked, as they were finishing up. Harry pulled his mouth away from the straw in his lemonade and looked up at him.

“Yeah.” He said quickly. It was stuck in his back pocket, the iPhone that Niall insisted on buying him. The only real reason that Harry had it was so that if he was out somewhere and Niall wasn’t with him and he needed help, he could call him. Harry rarely used it, but Niall helped pay for his data and unlimited minutes.

“You have it on you? I could give you my number.” He said, a smile on his face. Harry blushed and pulled it out of his pocket.

“Sure.” He replied. This was the first time that he had really exchanged numbers with anyone. The numbers he had on his phone were Niall’s and Zayn’s (Niall had forced him to put Zayn’s number in there in case he couldn’t reach Niall and he needed help).

Liam and Harry gave each other their numbers, Niall helping Harry enter it. Louis then asked for his number too, and Harry had both of them in his contacts.

By then, they had finished their lunch and Harry knew he had to get Niall out of there before he either started eating the entire dessert list or drinking pints.

“Well I think we should get home.” Niall said, after Harry had tapped at his knee. Harry was too shy to say it out loud, and he wasn’t sure if anyone else was ready to go.

“Yeah, I get it mate.” Zayn said, looking at the two of them. “Ready, boys?” he directed the question at Liam and Louis. They both nodded, and Niall raised his hand for the check. The waitress and Niall exchanged a few papers and words while Harry stared down at his phone, while he never really used before that point. Eventually, Niall’s hand was on his shoulder to let him know it was time to leave, and he stood up awkwardly, knocking his chair back. He stepped aside and Niall pushed it back in. Harry sighed and stared at it. Niall’s hand hovered by Harry’s back and Harry decided to walk instead of Niall touching him. The boys said their farewells to Niall and half-waved to Harry when he glanced up. Except for Louis. Louis muttered something to him that Harry couldn’t hear, so Harry just looked down again and followed Niall back to the car. Niall got to the passenger side first, and opened Harry’s door for him. Harry just sighed and climbed in, pulling it shut behind him. Niall came in and slammed the door on the driver’s side and started the car.

“So Haz, how was that?” Niall asked as he pulled away from the curb.

“S’good.” Harry replied, once again staring out the windshield.

“I’m glad.” Niall murmured, so quietly that Harry wasn’t sure he was meant to hear. He kept quiet and continued looking out the windshield, contemplating what had happened.

Contemplating the people he’d met.


	2. Pizza & iPhones

Chapter Two

 

Spring break was too fast for Harry’s liking, as he had Niall’s companionship during the long week that everyone had off. Niall had even let Harry work at the bakery extra days when he went out or needed to study. Harry didn’t like it how it was suddenly over as soon as it started, and he was alone again.

Harry liked being alone. That wasn’t a secret. Niall knew he liked his solitude and he liked being independent, but Harry definitely didn’t like being lonely. He could sit and watch a football match in the apartment, or try to watch some soap on in the middle of the day, but it was difficult to do that all day, every day, for five days straight. When he had absolutely no one to talk to, it became agonizing. Harry wasn’t very well understood, and people didn’t often spend the energy to understand him. He couldn’t blame them. He knew that people were paid to spend time with people like him, take care of them, and Harry was glad he didn’t need that. But he did wish he had a friend. There weren’t many people out of school who could just become friends with an intellectually challenged boy like Harry, especially around his age. Harry didn’t connect well with people much older than him; he had a really hard time even connecting with people his age. He could talk to people quite a bit younger than him, if they were kind, but for the most part, Harry was fairly anti-social.

Harry’s only real friend was Niall. He didn’t talk to other people much. His sister, Gemma, was busy without him. He had been a time-consuming little brother that had sucked up all the minimal attention that their adoptive parents could afford. Harry wasn’t proud of himself for being an attention hog, and he didn’t like that even now, he needed more attentiveness than Gemma. Gemma, a healthy older sister who was living on her own, had recently graduated school, and had a steady boyfriend that Harry expected her to marry. The last time he had seen Gemma was at her graduation, which was a little over seven months ago. Gemma, however, had not seen him. Harry was embarrassed of himself, and hated the things he had put Gemma through. He watched her graduation ceremony from afar and left soon. He didn’t want to see the disappointment in her eyes, and ruin her special day with his presence. 

So, that left Harry lonely most of the time. Alone wasn’t bad, but when Harry got lonely, he got upset. When he got upset, he tended to get frustrated and had more trouble with things, but that also led to him being stubborn and refusing to ask for help. He also had mood swings and that interfered with his day-to-day life with Niall, because he could have a mood for several days that’s dark and angry, and it affects the mood of Niall and makes it nearly impossible to communicate or get things done. Harry tries not to get into those moods but sometimes it feels like he can’t control it. He feels bad when he knows he can control it, but chooses not to. Harry often felt like he was taking advantage of the perks of his problems, when he should be trying to rise above them. Sometimes it just felt like he was trying to climb up a completely vertical cliff. 

Monday, Harry went to the bakery. They had a busy day and Harry went home tired and ready for sleep. When he woke on Tuesday morning, he woke up irritable and angry. Harry felt mad at the world, and he nearly threw a temper tantrum before Niall left to walk to school. Harry felt like crying after he left, so he curled up on his bed and flipped on the tellie. A football game was on, and Harry tried to tune in but mostly just stared at Niall’s bed in front of him as he was curled in a ball, wishing he knew how to deal with what was raging on in his head.   
Once the game was over, Harry stood up and, since his anger had drifted, started cleaning up Niall’s bed. He picked up the random articles of what Harry assumed were dirty clothing and tossed them into the dirty laundry basket, along with his sheets. Harry had no idea when the last time Niall’s sheets had been washed, and Harry was afraid to know how disgusting they were.   
Harry stripped both of their beds and tossed the sheets in the dirty laundry basket. 

When Harry was sure that he had everything that could be tossed into a load of laundry, Harry carried the basket to the downstairs Laundromat. Harry, who had trouble with reading and writing and math, was extremely glad he had Niall’s “emergency” credit card, which did all math for him and paid for the wash.

Harry stood in the door of the Laundromat, pleased to see there was only one other person in the room. Harry chose a machine that was on the far left wall, towards the middle of the room. Harry tossed the articles in the machine; going through the steps he’d done many times before. 

There was nothing left to do but wait after that. Harry sat on the floor against the machine and listened to its whirring sounds. That was the blessing and the curse: Harry had the time to sit around and listen to his laundry finish, but he had nothing to do with the time. He was bored, he was lonely, he didn’t know what he was doing with his life – Harry didn’t quite have the mind to go through everything in his head, but he knew one thing: he didn’t want this for the rest of his life.

***

When Niall got home from school, Harry had ordered pizza for what ended up being an early dinner. Niall had stayed at school for longer than Harry had expected, and he came home looking slightly flustered – not that Harry noticed. He was too worried about the cold pizza sitting on the tiny kitchen’s counter. 

“I’m… I’m sorry about this morning.” Harry nearly whispered, staring at Niall’s shoes, but not really seeing them. He slowly looked up at Niall’s slightly red face and mussed hair. Niall just nodded, his eyes roaming the room. Harry wasn’t deterred, but that was only because he didn’t think anything of Niall’s distractedness. He hardly noticed it. 

“I got pizza for us.” he continued, still completely oblivious to Niall’s state.

“Oh, good man. I’m starving.” he said, sliding past Harry and into the kitchen. It was then that Harry realized something was up.

When Harry had sauntered into the kitchen and poured himself a glass of orange juice, Niall was on his third piece, perched on a chair, eating the cold pizza without a plate.

“S’good.” Niall tried around the pizza in his mouth. Harry started wondering why Niall’s usually particular quiff was so disheveled. He was acting strange, and Harry wanted to know why.

“What’s wrong with you?” Harry wasn’t very good at subtlety. 

“Huh?” Niall said, his pink cheeks reddening again.

“What’s wrong with you?” Harry repeated. “You’re off.” 

“I’m fine.” Niall said, finishing his piece of pizza to seemingly avoiding the subject. 

“You’re weird.” Harry said, not taking the hint.

“I was just at school later.” Niall brushed it off, but Harry wasn’t easily shrugged off.

“Why?” Harry asked, pressing the subject.

“I was just studying.” Niall said, his cheeks blushing again, a smile creeping onto his face.

“You study here, with me.” Harry interjected, feeling a bit put out.

“I wasn’t studying with you, though, mate.” Niall’s grin was apparent.

“Who were you with?” Harry felt like Sherlock Holmes from the tellie, and also impedingly suspicious of his best friend. 

“Joanie…” He murmured, biting into the pizza again and staring longingly at the kitchen tile.

“Joanie? Who’s Joanie?” Harry pressed.

“Look, mate, she’s just a… study buddy. You wouldn’t understand.” 

“Why haven’t I heard of a Joanie before?” Niall was talking about her rather fondly to have never spoken about her before. Niall tended to gush about his friends.

“We were busy, Harry, okay? We had a ton of great–" Niall cut himself off, his eyes going wide. 

“What?” Harry asked, thoroughly confused.

“We did stuff. Alright? It’s nothing.” Niall tried to save the conversation, but even Harry started putting the pieces together. 

“Oh my – you, you did… _that?_ With a _girl?_ A girl you’ve never _met_ before?” Harry gasped, leaning away from Niall.

“Hey, Harry, it’s fine. Don’t think anything of it.” Niall chuckled, but Harry felt disgusting. He didn’t understand much about sex, he knew the vague idea of what happened and the product of it – without it, there wouldn’t be any babies – but he hadn’t ever really thought about his best _mate_ doing that.

“No, no. Go take a shower.” Harry could only imagine the vermin contaminating everything around him. 

“Harry, wait. It’s fine, I swear it’s fine, I don’t need to –" Niall began.

“ _No,_ go take a shower, _now!_ ” Harry was getting panicky. He no longer had any plans to eating any of the pizza left (although there wasn’t much left to begin with). 

“Okay, okay. Sorry mate.” Niall looked at him despairingly. 

“And leave all your clothes in the laundry hamper this time. Don’t touch anything on the way there.” Harry instructed, glaring him down until he left the small kitchen and turned immediately to his left into the bathroom. Harry groaned and pulled out his cleaning supplies from under the sink, beginning to scrub down the kitchen floor, chairs and table.

When Harry had finished cleaning every surface he could think that Niall could’ve touched, he then scrubbed down the shower when he got out, and sprayed Febreze into the laundry hamper that only held Niall’s clothes from the day. Niall rolled his eyes at the whole thing, but although that had to do with the fact that germs scared Harry more than anything (not that he actually understood them, but Niall let him think he did, so that he wouldn’t go insane with the thought that he couldn’t get rid of all of them) and that had to do with his “problems”, but he was the clean freak here, Niall had never been one to clean anything – ever. 

“Hey, look! You’ve got yourself a text.” Niall crowed, peering down at Harry’s iPhone screen. Harry was in the kitchen, putting the cleaning supplies away, and he didn't think much of it - probably one of those texts from the phone company or maybe Niall didn't know what he was talking about, but Harry didn't care much, so he continued. 

It was late, maybe nine or ten when Harry finally did check his phone, and he was surprised to see a text from Louis, Zayn's friend from lunch. Harry assumed it must be for Niall or something, and he leaned over towards him. 

"I think Louis wants to talk to you." Harry murmured, moving to hand Niall his phone. 

"Man, I don't want to see your phone and all the gay porn on there!" Niall joked, laughing at his own hilarity. Harry, however, had no idea what he was talking about. 

"Porn? What's porn?" Harry asked. 

"Uh, nothing. We'll save that lesson for a different day, never mind. Don't bring it up in conversation, please." Niall said awkwardly. Then he picked up where he left off. "Well, anyway, it’s not for me. If he wanted to talk to me, he'd text my phone - Haz, if he texted you, _your phone,_ then he wants to talk to _you._ " Niall smiled. Harry was dumbfounded. Why would Louis - _Louis_ , of all people, want to talk to him? Louis, from what Harry observed, seemed like a well collected person, an extremely hard exterior, and he obviously knew what he was doing... why would he bother texting Harry?

Harry clumsily unlocked his phone, going into his messages and staring down at the text. 

_Louis: hey_

Harry knew how to read, he knew how to write, even though he wasn't particularly good at either. It took him a while to type, he wasn't fast at writing to begin with, and he got frustrated by the tiny letters and his big thumbs and it just got annoying in every way.

"Niall?" Harry asked, tentatively, holding his phone a little towards him.

"Harry, I told you, if he's texting you, he doesn't want to text me." Niall sighed, his eyes focused on the game.

"No, it’s just; will you type it for me?" Harry asked quietly. He was glad Niall was there, since he was starting to get a headache. Before Niall replied, Harry got up and turned off the kitchen light, the brightness starting to prick in his brain.

"Oh, sure I guess." Niall looked surprised, staring down at the phone. 

Harry settled back down on the bed, rolling over into a loose fetal position facing Niall. 

"What do you want me to say?" Niall asked. 

"Uh..." Harry wasn't sure, he never really texted before. "Hello?" He made it sound like a question. 

"That's valid." Niall said, his thumbs flying across the keyboard.

"Wait!" Harry panicked. "Don't send it."

"Why not?" Niall asked. 

"Well does it sound... okay?" Harry asked timidly.

"Its fine, mate." He paused. "I'm going to send it now." Harry nodded.

Niall handed Harry back the phone, focusing on the game again, and Harry anxiously awaited Louis' reply. 

Only a few minutes later, Harry's phone lit up, with Louis' name showing Harry that he had another text.

_Louis: whats up?_

"Niall, what do I say?" Harry panicked, pushing his phone onto Niall's lap and sitting up.

"Harry, chill. Let's start with the truth. We're watching the game, yeah?" he said, quickly typing the message into the text box, and handing the phone back to Harry, turning his attention back to the game of footie.

Niall had sent a text back, reading: 

_Harry: watching the game with Niall. Hbu?_

"Niall!" Harry shrieked at the status of the message, and from the confusion he had over the last word. He swung his legs off the bed, facing Niall. "What does... H-B-U mean?"

"Harry, this isn't bomb diffusion, you're okay. It means 'how about you’; I basically reiterated the same question." Niall said patiently. "Seriously, you don't have to freak out." Niall said as Harry's worried mouth opened again. He frowned, but kept quiet, and put his chin in his hands.  
Another buzz a few minutes later set Harry into a frenzy once again.

_Louis: great! I'm watching it too, in fact, but just alone in my flat_

"Niall?" Harry held his phone out.

After reading it, he looked up. "Well, what do you want to say?" He asked.

"I don't... I don't know." Harry said awkwardly,

“Well, what I’d do is comment and then ask a question. It’s a common texting strategy, and good when you don’t know the lad very well.” Niall proposed.

Harry looked at him longer than a socially acceptable pause between replies had, but Niall was used to it, and waited. Harry opened his mouth and then sighed and gave up, looking at Niall exasperatedly. 

“Here, why not, ‘it’s a good game, the Colts’ defense is brilliant,’ and a simple how are you?” Niall suggested. Harry thought for a moment before replying.

“How about, ‘Niall’s really into the game, so I bet it’s good’, and a simple how are you?” Harry said.

“It’s your conversation.” Niall said before typing in Harry’s desired message and handing the phone back.

_Harry: Ni’s into it, so it must be good. how’s it going with you?_

Harry approved, and he lay back, wondering how any person could handle the stress of texting all the time. He was already ready for a break.

_Louis: its going great, just chillin. bout ready for some take out_

The conversation continued, with help from Niall and minimal embarrassments.

_Harry: take out sounds good. you get it a lot?_

_Louis: yeah, occupational hazard of going to uni._

_Harry: do you like uni?_

_Louis: for the most part. I like that I’m with my mates. not so much a fan of the work_

_Harry: it sounds nice, learning what you do, being around lads you like_

_Louis: I guess it might sound a lot more appealing to you. maybe I don’t appreciate it enough_

_Harry: it makes sense tho, you had more schooling than me in the first place._

_Louis: did you graduate secondary school?_

_Harry: hardly. I was in school until I was 17, but I was behind the rest of people my age. officially they gave me a high school diploma but I didn’t actually complete all of the schooling. my diploma has side notes on it, showing that it’s incomplete and “special”._

_Louis: but you seem to be faring well and all, with your job at the bakery and all_

_Harry: yeah, all is good. easier with ni._

_Louis: I like him. I sat with zayn and him at lunch today_

_Harry: hes the best. total legend_

“Niall! You… you… you _jerk!_ ” Harry yelled, snatching his phone away and assessing the damage done by Niall’s text that came solely from him, rather than even telling Harry he was sending something. But, Niall was laughing too hard to pay attention to Harry’s squabbling.

“NIALL! Now he’s gonna think I fancy you!” Harry flushed, his milky collarbones turning pink under his baggy t shirt. He sat down in the middle of his bed and crossed his legs, locked his phone and set it upside down on the bed, staring at the sheets, feeling severely put out.

“Aww Harry, don’t be like that. You can tell him I said that. Don’t worry, he won’t think you fancy me. I’d be more worried about him.” Niall said.

“What?” Harry asked, his stomach jumping. 

“Harry, you’ve never even tried to be a friend to someone besides me before. You obviously are taking a liking to him – he might not know it, but I’m sure he’ll figure it out. Even if you aren’t _fancying_ him right now, it’s no secret about which type of humans you take a fancy to.” Niall said. “Don’t worry, Harry, I’m glad. Try not to sweat it, things are going to be great.” He added on as Harry’s expression became slightly horrified. “It looks like you’re gonna have proper friend, Harry – one whose finally not me.”

Despite the blush covering Harry’s skin, he smiled – a smile he wasn’t used to feeling.


	3. Soda Pop

**Chapter 3**

 

Harry fell asleep texting Louis, awkwardly tucked up under himself next to Niall until his heavy eyes finally got the better of him. He woke up disoriented, with one of his hands asleep, cold and his arms covered in goosebumps. The clock read 4:17, and Harry didn’t understand how it could possibly be four in the afternoon – where was the sun?

 

“Ni…” Harry patted around the bed, this wasn’t his bed, where was he?

 

“Harry, go to bed.” Niall whispered, somewhere that wasn’t where Harry was expecting to hear his voice.

 

“Niall what’s… where…” Harry mumbled, scratching his stomach. It was dark.

 

            “Hold on, Harry.” Niall’s voice sounded. Niall’s warm hand touched beneath Harry’s elbow, righting him and guiding him to his own bed, Harry could make out Niall tearing away the covers. “Lie down.” He instructed, and Harry didn’t argue. “I’ll plug in your phone.

Goodnight, Harry.” Niall said. Harry mumbled a garbled reply and curled up under the covers, shivering into warmth.

 

***

 

Harry woke up to an empty flat, realizing he not only slept through Niall’s alarm, but his own, AND Niall getting ready for school. Harry sighed, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands, pushing himself into a sitting position and yawning. It was later than he was used to waking up, too late to go to the bakery, but there was something… something scratching at the back of his mind. Harry turned around, and his eyes fell onto his iPhone sitting on the shelf behind his bed.

 

“Louis.” It was the first word that came from Harry’s mouth that morning. His iPhone just looked like a symbol of Louis, and Harry hoped he’d get to talk to him again. Harry had never really talked to someone for pleasure on the thing before, but now he not only had, but had a reason to own a phone. For some reason, that thought made Harry’s heart swell. He had no idea what was happening, but he was already attached to this little boy from Doncaster.

 

After Harry’s shower, he made a bowl of cereal in nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist. He stared out the kitchen windows, the only place in their flat that even _had_ windows, and counted every red car that passed by on the road that lay next to the building their flat was in as he prepared and consumed his breakfast. He set his bowl in the sink, filled it with water, and then made his way to his dresser in the bed/tellie room. He pulled on a pair of black boxer briefs and some black short shorts that he inherited from his sister some years ago, as well as a white tshirt that he simply pulled over his head before carefully combing his hair back in front of his mirror, then returning to his bed, sitting on top of the carefully made covers and picking up his phone. He had two text messages.

 

Sliding open his phone, he realized both of them were from Louis, and for some reason he didn’t quite understand, it made his stomach swirl.

 

_7:52 Louis: hey_

_10:17 Louis: I have my last class with niall today… I was thinking we could grab pizza on the way home and I could hang at your flat for a while_

 

And… well. That sounded fantastic. But, Harry’s thumbs were slow and he wasn’t quite sure what to reply. It was only a few minutes after Louis’ last text, the clock currently read 10:24, but Harry’s stomach was churning and he felt… nervous? Why? He decided to leave his phone be and try not to think about it much. He decided to clean the kitchen.

 

Fifteen minutes later, Harry was washing his yellow gloves after scrubbing down the kitchen floor, sink, counter, table, and chairs. He decided to do the dishes afterwards, but he returned to his phone to see another message from Louis.

 

_10:28 Louis: if that’s okay with you?_

 

At least this gave him a question to answer. Harry wasn’t sure if he liked or disliked Louis’ decision to ask if it was okay with him. On the one hand, it was very thoughtful, but on the other hand, it could be viewed as babying. The last thing Harry wanted was to be babied by LOUIS.

 

_10:42 Harry: Sure. That sounds great!_

 

Harry read over his message too many times, hoping it didn’t sound too stupid. He felt like every time he sent a text he was questioning his style, like he had to constantly remind himself that he never texted ANYONE. He was also slightly frustrated with the fact that it took him much too long to correctly type the message. Harry set his phone back down on the bed and turned away, entering the kitchen again, grabbing his dish-scrub brush and Dawn dish soap to start cleaning all of the dishes. He meticulously scrubbed every single dish, triple checking each dish to make sure that all the food was gone and that each one smelled like soap before he set them in the drying rack. The towel was sitting next to the rack; waiting for him to finish every dish so he could dry and put them back in the cupboards.

 

After Harry was done washing, drying, and putting away every dish in the sink, he returned to his bed to check his phone. He had another text from Louis (he idly hoped Louis was paying attention aptly in class).

 

_10:45 Louis: awesome! We’ll be over right after school with some pizza… cheese good with you? mostly inoffensive…_

_11:03 Harry: Yeah cheese is good._

Harry stared at his message, wondering if he should add something. Eventually, he decided to send it. Less is more, right?

 

_11:05 Louis: see you at 4!_

Harry almost wanted to criticize that, Niall was hardly EVER home by four. 4:05, 4:10, 4:15, somewhere in between maybe. However, Harry refrained. He sat cross-legged on his bed for a minute or two before he realized what this meant. _Company_. He was about to have company over, at his home – and it was a mess!

 

Harry spent the next hour cleaning up the apartment. He took all of the laundry down to the laundromat and did two loads, returning upstairs to their flat to scrub down the bathroom in between. He got his supplies out again from under the sink, thankful that he’d already cleaned the kitchen today (although he considered scrubbing the floor more thoroughly). He did a vinegar wash of the bathroom floor, and while he waited for that, he scrubbed down the bathtub and shower walls with his fine brush and some Comet, scrubbing grime out of the corners and leaving the tub a sparkling white. Harry then wiped up the floor and proceeded to use his scrub brush to clean in between the floor tiles, then used scrub wipes and Comet to clean the surfaces of the toilet, then the scrub brush and toilet cleaner to scrub the inside. After cleaning the floor, shower, and toilet, Harry thoroughly washed his gloves and returned to the laundromat to get the two loads, using the clean sheets to remake his and Niall’s beds, then folding the clothes and putting them away. After he was sure that he got all of the trash in the flat, he took out the trash to the dumpster outside the building and returned inside to clean the bathroom sink and check that there was extra toilet paper and tissues.

 

After everything was clean, Harry washed his cleaning supplies and put them back under the sink, washed his hands and arms, poured himself a glass of milk, and got his phone from the bedroom/tellie room before sitting down at the kitchen table. The time read 1:46, and Harry had two hours and fourteen minutes to figure out what he was going to do. Butterflies were swirling in his tummy, he both wanted Louis to get there immediately and never show up. What was he going to wear? Where was Louis going to sit? Were they going to watch tellie and eat on the beds? Were they going to eat at the kitchen table? Was there enough drink in the fridge? Harry wondered if he should drop by the store. Maybe he’d go into the bakery and pick up some sweet pastries for after pizza. Or would that be too many carbohydrates? He doubted Niall would care, but what if Louis hated carbs? Harry tried to think back to what he ate for lunch the other day, but he couldn’t remember what he had ordered. Harry had an odd memory that kept replaying in his head of Louis looking down, sunlight lighting up his hair, shifting in his jean jacket, and the shadow from the sun behind him making his red shirt look maroon. It seemed innocent enough; except for the fact that Harry had no description for him except for “beautiful”, and that worried him a little.

 

Harry looked through the fridge. There was a half quart of milk left and one of Niall’s beers, but other than that, nothing to drink. Harry wasn’t sure what Louis liked, but he figured a bottle of pop and a six pack of beer should do. He’d just get Niall’s favorite.

 

Harry swapped his black short-shorts for a pair of black skinny jeans, the type he seemed to always wear. He didn’t want to worry about choosing a nice shirt that he’d have for the night, he didn’t want to mess it up while he went shopping.

 

Since Niall walks to school, Harry could take the truck out shopping. He pulled on his shoes and grabbed the keys off of the key hook next to the door. He was about to lock the door behind him when he realized he left his phone in the flat. A panicky thought of Louis texting him and not getting a reply and Louis deciding not to come flashed through his mind, or Louis texting him something he wanted to have tonight, like a specific type of drink, and Harry not getting it because he didn’t see it. Who knew his phone could be so important?

 

Harry parked in the back of the parking lot, still rubbish at parking. He could make it between the lines, but he was always crooked and sometimes too far forward or back. Red lights were his favorite part of driving, by far.

 

Harry locked the door of the truck, checking his phone was in his pocket before he started walking towards the front of the Tesco. It was windy, the sky was grey – it was spring and he wouldn’t be surprised if it was pouring by the time he returned outside.

 

The aisles were filled with a lot of temptations – Harry loved food, he loved cooking, and he totally would make a proper dinner, but he and Niall could rarely afford the nicer foods so they mostly stuck to ramen and pizza. Harry tried to make a healthier dinner a few times a week but it was usually small and they had to eat leftovers of it for a while. Either way, it was good to not have salty noodles for a change.

 

The soda pop was all on one aisle, kind of towards the back, surrounded in all of the college foods, the super cheap and super unhealthy foods. Candy, processed and packaged dinners, not the finer foods in life. Unfortunately, Harry spent most of his time at the grocery store in this section.

 

Harry selected a few off-brands of pop, equivalents to Pepsi, Sprite, and Root Beer, setting them in his basket and making his way off to the liquor aisle. Naturally, it was darker and creepier than any other aisle, and Harry could almost promise himself that this aisle was dirtier than any other aisle in the store. He pushed past the thought in his head, searching through the brands of beer to find Niall’s favorite, ignoring the menacing stance of the other, stronger, liquors at the end of the aisle. He plucked a six pack of Niall’s strong, Irish beer off the shelf before making his way back to the front of the store. He kept thinking about Louis. Would Louis like this beer? Does Louis drink pop? Does Louis do the shopping for him and his roommate? Does Louis even HAVE a roommate? Harry realized that he had no clue where or how he lives. He wondered if Louis had a job. He wondered about his family. Harry was so busy wondering he almost tripped over a stand near the check-out lanes and fell over, knocking some of the packages of whatever onto himself.

 

“Dang it,” Harry whispered, pushing his basket a little ways away as he stood up and started putting the packages back onto the stand, wishing he didn’t have such long gangly limbs. He stayed doubled over, trying to recreate the artful way they had been on the stand, but Harry wasn’t the most artistic person, and he was also extremely clumsy. He kept knocking them down while he tried to put them back up, and began to get frustrated with the task and himself. He let out a groan, but it sounded a little too much like a cry of irritation to his ears, and he wanted to just leave.

 

“Harry?” a voice sounded to Harry’s left. He picked his head up slowly, the shoes looking familiar. He stood up to his full height, and recognized Zayn’s friend Liam from lunch. He was holding Harry’s basket, staring at him oddly. Harry was starting to wish he would melt into the floor. Now that he was standing, he could see all the turned heads and gawks at the mess that was covering the floor. Harry’s eyes were pricking and his face felt like it was in flames. Now even Liam, the friendliest person Niall’s ever brought to lunch, thinks Harry’s crazy. Like too many other people.

 

            “I, uh…” Harry began, his cheeks red, one hand fiddling with the hem of his shirt.

 

            “Would you like some help?” Liam asked, leaning over to set Harry’s basket down.

 

            “Uh, yes please,” Harry responded, scratching the back of his neck slowly.

 

            Liam bent over to pick up some of the packages, quickly setting them on the shelf without messing with their position too much. At least he didn’t knock them off every time he tried to set another up.

 

            “What are you doing here?” Harry asked slowly, awkwardly.

 

            “Same as you, shopping,” Liam replied, a smile in his voice.

 

            “Don’t you have school?” Harry asked, confused.

 

            “Yes, but no. I only have two morning classes, then the rest of the day off. It’s really nice to have the middle of the day open, time to get things done. No distractions when I’m doing homework, the supermarket is a lot less busy, the dorms are quiet. It’s pretty nice. Do you not have a shift at the bakery today?”

 

            “Uh, no. I woke up too late to go in,” Harry explained. “I’m actually going to stop by there later to get something for tonight.”

 

            “Something exciting happening at your flat tonight then?” Liam asked, only slightly suspiciously. Harry didn’t pick up on it.

 

            “Yeah,” Harry smiled. “Louis is coming over. Niall, him and I are gonna eat pizza and hang out after they get out of class.” The two straightened up as the packets were all back in their place.

 

            “Exciting! You definitely got the right drinks,” Liam commented, “Louis loves Root Beer.”

 

            Harry beamed, his excitement for the night returning, the memory of the stares surrounding him fading.

 

            “Well, if you’re wondering what to get from the bakery, Louis does love his sweets,” Liam offered with a grin.

 

            “Thank you,” Harry said sincerely. He retrieved his basket, and when he stood up, Liam was looking at him rather fondly. Harry turned his feet in towards themselves.

 

            “I hope you have fun tonight,” Liam said, his face kind.

 

            “Thank you,” Harry repeated, smile large on his face.

 

            “Well, I’d best be getting on with my shopping. I’ll see you and Niall soon, I bet!” Liam smiled, waving as he walked off. Harry waved back, walking towards the cashier’s line, spirit revived, nerves all but silenced.

 

            Today was going to be _wonderful._


End file.
